Bismillahir Rahmanir Rahim.
Too many times, have I become lost.
For most of my years I was searching, and my journey began as I entered the forest of the dark. I travelled amongst its’ many paths. There was a path of happiness. A path of remorse. A path of fantasy. A path of disparity. A path of vanity. A path of regret. A path of love. A path of pain. And for each of the paths I followed, I ran towards the platform as the train came by, with it, its’ chain of fleeting moments. It was enchanting. Those fleeting moments illuminated the dark of the forest. Until the train left, to which the platform had then lost its purpose, so it crumbled. My balance lost as I fall flat on my face.
And all of a sudden, it was dark again.
I pull myself up, because I am not hopeless, I stand looking, in the dark of the forest, in search for yet another path, in hopes of spending some time, in something warmer and more lambent. So I run yet again to another platform, to be mesmerised again by a new train of uplifting moments, only to be met with the same fate. As the train leaves my sight, and the purpose of that platform fulfilled, it shatters, and again I find myself in the dark.
My search continues. And by definition, if I am searching, it must mean I am also lost.
So, too many times, have I become lost. And too many times, I craved for the light. Why do I lose it, every time I find it?
Because the light I found using all of my efforts, was as long lasting as the flame that burns on a candle, until the wind blows it away. It was transient, not everlasting, yet I used all of my energy to be with it again and again. Why? Why did I try so hard to be with this kind of light?
So there finally came a time, where I didn’t heedlessly run towards the platform. Instead I lay for a while on the cracked ground, my face flat on its surface. I then sit up, and I recognise the many paths leading to its various platforms. But I decide to remain seated in this dark, and I contemplate.
I question my beginning, the purpose of my life in this world, as well as my end. I learn that the first pair of humans to have set foot in this world came from their world. They came from a world that placed them in a position close to their Creator. Their hearts were full of Love for Him, the love that gave their hearts life. The Creator who made the perfect world, with eternal delights, that could fully satisfy the instincts and organic needs of the human being.
Until one fateful day, when the pair of humans were stripped of that close connection, and sent off to a world far from home, a world that was just like that train of fleeting moments somewhere within a dark and gloomy forest. They find themselves in a world full of these temporary moments. Moments that brought delight and despair. So they search. They search for a way back to their perfect place. The place of eternal joy, the place to be together with their beloved Creator.
They travel through the ocean called the dunya (this world), sailing through it via the vessels called their hearts. Remembering the God who gave their heart its life, and therefore not letting the ocean known as the dunya to enter their vessels, not giving their hearts the chance to sink. They fill their hearts with love for God, the heart that was built to revere Him and only Him, allowing for the love of the eternal to shed a light that navigated their vessels towards Him, even in the dark and stormy weather. This path was the straight path, the path that brought with it light, and only light, the path that decided their eternity.
So, as I sit in the dark of the forest, I’m no longer running down the paths that led me to a dim light of moments that quickly burnt out, burning me with it. I finally realise where the true light is. In a heart that loves God. And this goes for both you and I, that so long as our heart is filled with this kind of love, our surroundings will forever fluoresce, and with this love, we can spread its magnificent light along the path we walk down. A straight path of guidance and love set by the Creator Himself. A path that will finally take us to where we truly belong. Our true and only home. The home known as Paradise.
This is Apple speaking from her heart, anyways, sweet dreams everybody, love you all!